Rocks in a Storm


I thought you were gonna be my rock?


I thought we would be able to hold each other on those bad days?

You know those days when my hair doesn’t lay the right way… then I go into work and get yelled at for not meeting my deadline… 

And then I forget my lunch on the countertop at home & have to buy lunch when I needed that money for the cable bill due the next day.


I thought you were going to be there.

I thought you would be there for those days when I didn’t need you to criticize me but instead I needed you to compliment my lipstick and the shoes I decided to wear to look pretty for you.

Why weren’t you there?

 

Baby,

I know I sound a little selfish but was I ever really taught to love?

I’m trying to learn from you.

I wasn’t shown the correct way to love. 

But is there really even a correct way?

All I know is the way that I know.

All you know is the way that you know.

I thought you were going to be there to teach me your way.

Teach me how you want to be loved.

And I would be your rock.

 

Like rocks, we survived the toughest of storms.

Through the rain, snow, hurricanes and storms we continued to stay strong.

At least I thought.

But like rocks, we are weathered by our conditions.

Although we are strong, we can dilute.

Become weaker.

Even when everything seemed to be fine in my eyes, I wasn’t aware that you were breaking down inside.


Maybe I was too selfish to see what was wrong.

Or maybe I just couldn’t fathom the fact that I wasn’t what was right.

How do I give you a part of myself without giving you a part of myself?

I am who I am but I needed to be who you are.

Keep you safe.


I needed to be able to hold you on those bad days.

You know those days when you get a stain on your dress shirt from driving to work and trying to eat your breakfast at the same time… or when you found out that you had to pay a fine for a minor traffic violation in 10 days… 

or when you drank too many beers after work and needed me to pick you up from the bar.


You thought I was going to be there.

You thought I was going to be there for those days when you didn’t need me to criticize you but instead you needed me to help you with your business plan.

Why wasn’t I there?

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